I recently took drastic measures and banned myself from a certain store in my local plaza. It seems whenever I go into this store, I come out with a book related to my upcoming marriage and the birth of my first child. I had to get things under control so I’ve banned myself until March 1.

These are the items I’ve picked up so far.

Since I’ve been preparing for this, I’ve been interested in certain “womanly” things more than usual. These are the other things I’ve been doing to prepare.

The Rubbermaid Reveal spray mop

This is what got the ball rolling. After purchasing this mop, I developed a sudden interest in mopping the floor. Prior to this, I can probably count on one hand the number of times in my entire life I’ve said, “Let me go mop the floor.”

Somehow, I’ve always been in a house with other people who did the mopping. This mop set off an increased interest in all things domestic.

A pie crust

After two years of thinking about it, I finally learned how to make a pie crust from scratch.

Knitting

Within a week of learning how to make a pie crust from scratch, it seemed my next assignment in the school of womanly things was waiting for me. Some local knitters volunteered to teach me how to knit. I always thought it was kind of cool when an old friend of mine in university knit a sweater for her boyfriend.

After the first two lessons, I realized that the sweater thing will never happen. I know my limitations and I don’t see myself knitting a sweater that any human could wear in public.

I’ve been focusing on scarves and blankets. Pretty much stuff requiring zero talent where you knit one row, turn back and knit another row.

Well, I pretty much have everything I need ready. I have learned all the things a woman about to get married should know how to do. I have the baby books read. I have a wedding etiquette book. I have wedding music. It feels as if I’m missing something though.

Something that’s very necessary when getting married or creating a child. I can’t put my finger on it. The dress? No, that’s not it. The Wedding Date: No, I’ve set a date of June 23. What is it? What am I missing to make this all happen? Hmm.

For the first time, I’ll have to write an article in two parts.

This article is hereby suspended until I remember the one item that I’m missing to make this all happen.

(To be continued)

This article was originally published on February 22, 2011.